This ancient artefact, discovered behind my fridge, consists of 6ft of perfectly circular piping (possibly alien origin), capped at one end with an ingenious rubber, um cap, with a metal tightening ring of very substantial durability. The other end, in a design masterstroke, is left open, and ever so slightly wonky or elliptical as archaeologists would say.
Its true function is unknown - experts are baffled - but Dr Xavier Schlippenbutt of the Sasquatch Institute has suggested a variety of uses : spider hypnotizer, two-man musical bongo, willow soaker, neighbour wall "shut up" knocker, and as a ceremonial pillar-of-water used in fertility rites.
One thing's for sure...it's a fascinating object, and this is a rare opportunity to be its next custodian. A certificate of authenticity can be supplied, but personally I wouldn't bother.
Serious enquiries only please.

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mystery object (Ewell)